Wednesday, December 03, 2008


The Persimmon Lounge is pleased to announce that we are finally evolving. Our motto has always been "If you can't beat them, join them. Or at least hybridize." And since it seems the unconquerable kumquat is here to stay, we are joining forces with the delectable fruit. Don't change your personalized linens yet, we are still the Persimmon Lounge, but from now on we will be lauding the value of kumquats as well as the estimable Persimmon.
Kumquats are my next favorite winter fruit anyway. They freeze great, they taste great, and they are a really good deal if you order them from Florida. Here is the address: http://www.kumquatgrowers.com/retail.html. I have ordered these several times and have never been disappointed. And of course they look beautiful when resting in a bowl of persimmons.
There are lots of things you can do with the two fruits together. Persimmon Kumquat Jelly is a rare delicacy and you will be the hit of the neighborhood if you start spreading this around on your toast. Persimmon Kumquat Pie is also delicious according to my imagination. There are millions of things I can think of to do with the both of them. I am thinking of all of them right now. I would love to hear your suggestions as well. Our next article will be on the amalgamation of Persimmons and Kumquats so stay tuned and tell your friends.

Tuesday, December 02, 2008


Who wants in? I am thinking of scrapping the whole Persimmon Taste-a-thon this year because fan club members are dropping like flies. So far its only me and my nephew Jonas who will be there. And maybe just me. If I knew anyone else was interested though, I might consider keeping the flame alight.

Friday, April 04, 2008


Its time for Persimmon Pruning with Jennifer, the annual class that attracts millions of viewers each year. And this year we should have room for everyone to fit on to the patio at once, as long as participants make reservations. You won't want to miss this informational class. We will have the honor of listening to the infamous persimmon and pruning expert Jennifer who will teach us the intricacies of correct cutting, the usage of ESP in communicating with plants, pollination and child appropriate ratings, and how to make a killer shish-ka-bob. Guest entertainment includes a Youtube video by Flight of the Concordes and refreshments will be brought to you by yourself. Please join us on this auspicious occasion.

Wednesday, January 30, 2008


New Member Welcome:
The notable Persimmon Lounge would like to transmit greetings to our neonatal and most acute member Rebekah Sellers of Provo, Utah. We are very juiced up to have Rebekah adhere to our faction and would also like to proffer the solicitation to her to be our dewy Thesauralogical Consultant. As many of you apperceive, we exploit a plethora of words here at the Lounge and recurrently need aide in the veridical usage and disposition of said terms. Since Rebekah has a rapture for spelling and for scribal symbols of all assortments, even colorful ones such as profanation, we are cognizant and affectionate to have her agglutinate our assemblage.

Wednesday, November 28, 2007







You are invited

to an extraordinary event

December 14th at 7 pm

The Basically Annual: Palatable Persimmon Extravaganza

Come and enjoy delicious Persimmon dishes From Many Lands.

Your assignment: Bring a delicious persimmon dish from one or more lands to share

Please RSVP as seating is limited: junipersimmon@hotmail.com


Wednesday, July 11, 2007


Due to a lack of Interest:

Due to the obvious lack of interest, the annual Persimmon Walk-a-thon will be canceled. However if you would still like to purchase a T-shirt stating that you did indeed attend the Walk-a-thon, you may send your orders into Jennifer by the 5th of August.
Shirts cost $15 plus shipping and come in your choice of color.

Friday, July 06, 2007

I will get dressed today. I will exercise today. I will empty the cat litter.
Job Openings!!!
Of course we are still here. We have just been very busy traveling the world as we usually do for Persimmon News. Its hard being everywhere at once, so if you would like to sign up to be a Persimmon Lounge Correspondent, let us know and we will get you to work immediately. We need more people on the force to be able to have more time to keep our Newsletter updated, and we are looking for people like YOU right now. Its a great job, all Travel expenses paid**. Email us now with your letter of inquiry and a brief essay on your feelings regarding the persimmon and our Persimmon Lounge President.
** travel expenses are not actually paid.

Wednesday, November 08, 2006


The latest Announcement!

The Persimmon Lounge will be hosting its annual persimmon recipe taste-a-thon November 30th, 2007 at Jennifer the President's house at 6:30 p.m. Last year was an incredible success, so much fun that most of the pictures cannot be shown. Get out your favorite persimmon recipe to show off and share with your fellow clubmembers. When we say share, we mean we want to eat it, so you need to make it and bring the actual product, not just the recipe. Prepare the best dish you can because they taste better that way. Your future in the club depends on your attendance since your membership is free and we have the right to ostracize or ignore. Please R.S.V.P. soon as there is limited room and tons of people who want to be cool.

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Assistant Hair-Artist involved in Freak Pruning Accident!!

A freak pruning accident leaves Michelle disfigured after falling from a large persimmon tree on September 9th. Michelle, who currently serves as Assistant Hair-Artist and occasional Activities Chair, was teaching some basic pruning skills to a group of children last Saturday when a large bird attacked her skilsaw. The bird lost its legs in the rotating blades sending the emancipated limbs into the crowd of small children who began to panick. Somehow in the confusion, Michelle was caught in the cord of the saw which caused her to lose her balance. She fell 16 feet from the tree, face-first, onto a riding lawnmower which was in use. Fortunately the operator of the mower was not injured and he had just emptied his clippings so he was able to drive Michelle to the hospital at a frenzied speed of 8 miles per hour.
Michelle is recovering nicely now and though she no longer has control of her eyebrows, she is anxious to finish her pruning job. We all wish her a quick recovery and want her to know that we never liked her for her looks anyway. Join us at the Lounge in wishing Michelle well by posting your comments here.





Wednesday, August 30, 2006



HARVEST UPDATE:
As written by our Pacific States Correspondent Nikki Keify
(Actual photos of Nikki's developing persimmons, not the first time they have been seen)
Your fabulous world-traveling President Jennifer has taken time out of her busy and important schedule to extend an invitation to myself. I would like to thank her and her oh-so-supportive staff on the most auspicious of occasions. I have two "California" persimmon trees and have personally experienced the bitter-persimmon-face effect of tasting them before they wanted me to. I was in intensive taste-bud care for two weeks, and have fascial muscle therapy every Wednesday at 7. I have managed to secure Jacques Pilisiay, World Renowned Persimmon Photograper, to capture my persimmons each week so you might watch them mature with me.
Viva La Nikki
P.S. Jacques is fired
Tiny questions, little Answers

Dear President,
I was wondering if you would consider being an extra in a movie about persimmons?
Darryl Hedgeway
Imperial, Pennsylvania

Darryl,
I guess you don't get out much do you? I already WAS in a movie about persimmons. It was a little film called The Bourne Ultimatum. I played the persimmon dealer in the market in Tangiers. I was a key character in the scene where Nikki Parson is trying to escape from Desh, the hitman. She knocks a few persimmon off the table as she is running, then suddenly she realizes what she has done and runs back, picks up the persimmons, dusts them off and carefully places them back on the table. Then I dramatically tap her shoulder and tell her that luck will be on her side. It was very touching. I am surprised you don't remember it. There is a rumor around Hollywood that I am a potential nominee for an Oscar. If you haven't seen the movie, I highly recommend it as an important historical piece on the world's most delicious fruit, the persimmon.

Jennifer
President

Dear President of the Persimmon Fan Club,
What is your stance on Free trade?
Horace Wordsly
Green Bay, Indiana

Dear Horace,
I believe in the golden rule. It is always nice to share. For example, if I get a box of persimmons, I might give one or two away to people who I really like. I tell them it's free, but because of the golden rule, I expect them to give me something really cool in return. Thats called trading. Its free as long as you share with me too. Oh, you asked about my stance. I usually stand with my legs shoulder-width apart with one arm to my side and the other arm extended in a gesture of giving with the persimmon placed upon the palm. I find that method works best.

Sincerely,
Jennifer
President

Dear Vice-President Rebecca,
It seems like you haven't been around much lately, and your President seems a little overworked. Maybe you should give her a break and let her have a day off or two. She really deserves it. She works her fingers to the bone. The least you could do is take her to the spa and treat her to a full day and a half of relaxation and pampering. Why don't you get off your buns and help her out a bit?

Gertie Monahan
Yappa, South Dakota

Dear Gertie,
I am so sorry Rebecca couldn't answer your letter personally but she is a bit hard to track down at the moment. In between brow waxing, pedicures and wild motorcycle rides her time is pretty much used up. Don't worry about me I think I can handle all the pressures of the Lounge, plus my experiments on a new Persimmon hybrid to cure cancer, plus my charity work with underaged children, plus my research on "The Effects of Eating Persimmons as a Way to Offset Terminal Agoraphobia", plus the KittenKaboodle club, as well as answering the enormous amounts of fan mail that I like to personally respond to each and every single one. Please don't be too hard on Rebecca. I have always wanted to die in the service of my persimmon fan club members and she is so busy looking for a new chihuahua carrier/purse. The time and energy I devote to the Lounge is a mere penance for not discovering the persimmon earlier in my childhood so that I could share it with the world a little sooner.

Yours forever,
Jennifer the President

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Guest speaker Frances Stuncter will be addressing the Persimmon Fan Club on the "Popularity of Persimmon Proximity" October 4th. We are very excited to have her in our midst. Her knowledge of the persimmon has been extrememely counterproductive in our research and we welcome her warmly. Please RSVP if you would like to attend.
Things that would taste better if they were persimmon flavored:
slimfast

clam chowder
sunny delight

E.L. fudge
motor oil
toothpaste
concrete
green bell peppers


We love your comments. They are very important to our ego development. Please feel free to share your feelings.

Thursday, July 27, 2006


Presidential Travel Journal:
Trip Log of South Korea ( August 19-25)
South Korea is beautiful. Its a good thing I did a report on this country when I was in 6th grade or I would be lost and confused. I am staying with the penpal I was assigned to in 6th grade as well. She was surprised to see me since I hadn't written her a letter since 7th grade. She has been extremely hospitable regardless, although I am still unsure if I am calling her by her first name or last name. Tomorrow we go to the Shindzu temple on main street, six blocks up from the tongue depressor factory (if I am understanding her correctly). Here I will learn the art of making persimmon Kimchee. It is sure to be a treat. Until then, Your traveling President- Jennifer
Trip Log of Macedonia (June 26-July 7 2006)
I have realized that no one cares about my journeys except for myself so I have deleted the Macedonian desert out of my memoirs. Tomorrow I rest for one day more in Macedonia and then I take my travels to South Korea to the Shindzu Temple of the Persimmon and learn how to make some really great persimmon Kimchee. Until then, your traveling president, Jennifer

Feature Article:
Get to know the Persimmon. From experience Captain John Smith said, "If it is not ripe it will draw a man's mouth awrie with much torment."

Origin: The oriental persimmon is native to China, where it has been cultivated for centuries and more than two thousand different cultivars exist. It spread to Korea and Japan many years ago where additional cultivars were developed. The plant was introduced to California in the mid 1800's.

Fruit:
Persimmons can be classified into two general categories: those that bear astringent fruit until they are soft ripe and those that bear nonastringent fruits. Astringent means it will almost kill you if you eat it before it is fully ripe. Not only will it turn your mouth awry with torment, it will force you to think you are having a serious allergic reaction as your tongue swells up, your mouth loses all forms of saliva and your brain tricks you into thinking you can no longer breath. An astringent cultivar must be jelly soft before it is fit to eat, nonastringent persimmons are always edible even before they are soft. For this reason, my favorite variety of persimmon is the Fuyu because it has never fooled me into thinking it was okay to eat when it wasn't. Astringency can also be removed by freezing the fruit overnight and then the thawing softens the fruit and removes the astringency.

Recipes!!!!!!!!

Why should you cook with Persimmons? Listen to our southern states correspondent Bob Mahoney...

“I have learned that persimmons are a great source of vitamin C, beta carotene and fiber. I have not done much cooking with persimmons, but have used them to predict what type of winter we will have. ”

Recipe of the Month!!!

Persimmon Cilantro Salsa Recipe

from: Gayla

Servings: 3/4 cup


¼ cup chopped fresh
cilantro1 ½ tablespoon minced red onion1 tablespoon fresh lime juice1 teaspoon minced jalapeƱo pepper2 ripe persimmons, peeled and coarsely chopped
Combine all ingredients in a bowl, and stir well. Cover and chill.


New Member Welcome…


Our newest member is Melanie Morales, currently residing in Orlando, Florida. We are so excited to have her join our exclusive club. Melanie will also be our new free-lance writer (meaning that she will write for free). We look forward to reading her thought-proving articles describing her personal discovery of the Persimmon.

If you would like to be mentioned in our new member welcome please email us and tell us why you should be considered, or add your comments on our site.



mascots: Nicodemus and Fiona
We Welcome you to the
The Semi-Official Persimmon Fan Club

Our Organization:
The Persimmon Lounge is a newsletter dedicated to celebrating one of the world's most delicious fruits. We here at the Lounge are creative people who enjoy the fruit and need an outlet for unbridled enthusiasm. When we discovered the fruit of the gods, we found that most people don't even know what a persimmon is. We decided that the easiest way to spread our unnatural passion was to create a newsletter that contained facts about persimmons and false statements about everything else. Our hope is that we do not offend any one, but if we do, get over it.


Things we hate about other Fruits…
  • “Bananas have the worst tasting peel I have ever tried. And I have tried a lot of peels that most people haven’t.” Jennifer, President
  • 'Oranges always get under my fingernails and dye my finger tips orangey-yellow. Then it looks like I smoke, which I do, but I don’t want people to know that.” Greta - Wy
  • “Papayas taste like vomit.” Rebecca, Vice-President
  • “A pomegranate is another nice fruit that starts with the letter P, but they are very messy and they stain, and they surely do not compare with the persimmon.” BerthaMae- Hahavemale, FL
  • “I am allergic to watermelon and it makes me have asthma.”Lorna - Ashcroft, B.C.
  • “Persimmons are a lot bigger than grapes, and raisins are like miniature grapes.” Kelsey- Roy, UT
  • “Who doesn’t like a persimmon? When someone gives me a strawberry I say “What the heck!?” and then I throw it over my shoulder and go and get a persimmon.” Derek-Riverton, UT
  • “Once I tasted a star-fruit and it didn’t taste anything like a star but it did have some fruitiness to it. I think that is false advertising.” Christina-Roswell, NM
  • If you eat cataloupe on the thing, then it gets all over you and it gets you all sticky, and that is NOT some sweet action.” Michelle- Persimmon Activities Committee
  • “Pineapple comes in this hard shell that is very hard to crack open with a hammer.” Michael-Mililani, HI
  • “Raspberry seeds get stuck in my teeth and it hurts my mouth to chew on them. I am very sensitive and I squench at the thought.” Justin-Utah

Disclaimer


There is very little if any credibility to this website. We are merely experts in tasting persimmons. One of us is a horticulturist and is planning on planting a persimmon tree in her yard. The statements on our site about the persimmon itself are fact. The recipes are genuine recipes that we have received from fan club members or stolen from forbidden cookbooks. Anything of a questionable nature is indeed questionable. We are not sure where we get our information from or if we have made it up.
If you have any questions or inquiries that are not answered on our site here feel free to email us at
persimmonfanclub@gmail.com