HARVEST UPDATE:
As written by our Pacific States Correspondent Nikki Keify
(Actual photos of Nikki's developing persimmons, not the first time they have been seen)
Your fabulous world-traveling President Jennifer has taken time out of her busy and important schedule to extend an invitation to myself. I would like to thank her and her oh-so-supportive staff on the most auspicious of occasions. I have two "California" persimmon trees and have personally experienced the bitter-persimmon-face effect of tasting them before they wanted me to. I was in intensive taste-bud care for two weeks, and have fascial muscle therapy every Wednesday at 7. I have managed to secure Jacques Pilisiay, World Renowned Persimmon Photograper, to capture my persimmons each week so you might watch them mature with me.
Viva La Nikki
P.S. Jacques is fired

Tiny questions, little Answers

Dear President,
I was wondering if you would consider being an extra in a movie about persimmons?
Darryl Hedgeway
Imperial, Pennsylvania

Darryl,
I guess you don't get out much do you? I already WAS in a movie about persimmons. It was a little film called The Bourne Ultimatum. I played the persimmon dealer in the market in Tangiers. I was a key character in the scene where Nikki Parson is trying to escape from Desh, the hitman. She knocks a few persimmon off the table as she is running, then suddenly she realizes what she has done and runs back, picks up the persimmons, dusts them off and carefully places them back on the table. Then I dramatically tap her shoulder and tell her that luck will be on her side. It was very touching. I am surprised you don't remember it. There is a rumor around Hollywood that I am a potential nominee for an Oscar. If you haven't seen the movie, I highly recommend it as an important historical piece on the world's most delicious fruit, the persimmon.

Jennifer
President

Dear President of the Persimmon Fan Club,
What is your stance on Free trade?
Horace Wordsly
Green Bay, Indiana

Dear Horace,
I believe in the golden rule. It is always nice to share. For example, if I get a box of persimmons, I might give one or two away to people who I really like. I tell them it's free, but because of the golden rule, I expect them to give me something really cool in return. Thats called trading. Its free as long as you share with me too. Oh, you asked about my stance. I usually stand with my legs shoulder-width apart with one arm to my side and the other arm extended in a gesture of giving with the persimmon placed upon the palm. I find that method works best.

Sincerely,
Jennifer
President

Dear Vice-President Rebecca,
It seems like you haven't been around much lately, and your President seems a little overworked. Maybe you should give her a break and let her have a day off or two. She really deserves it. She works her fingers to the bone. The least you could do is take her to the spa and treat her to a full day and a half of relaxation and pampering. Why don't you get off your buns and help her out a bit?

Gertie Monahan
Yappa, South Dakota

Dear Gertie,
I am so sorry Rebecca couldn't answer your letter personally but she is a bit hard to track down at the moment. In between brow waxing, pedicures and wild motorcycle rides her time is pretty much used up. Don't worry about me I think I can handle all the pressures of the Lounge, plus my experiments on a new Persimmon hybrid to cure cancer, plus my charity work with underaged children, plus my research on "The Effects of Eating Persimmons as a Way to Offset Terminal Agoraphobia", plus the KittenKaboodle club, as well as answering the enormous amounts of fan mail that I like to personally respond to each and every single one. Please don't be too hard on Rebecca. I have always wanted to die in the service of my persimmon fan club members and she is so busy looking for a new chihuahua carrier/purse. The time and energy I devote to the Lounge is a mere penance for not discovering the persimmon earlier in my childhood so that I could share it with the world a little sooner.

Yours forever,
Jennifer the President

Guest speaker Frances Stuncter will be addressing the Persimmon Fan Club on the "Popularity of Persimmon Proximity" October 4th. We are very excited to have her in our midst. Her knowledge of the persimmon has been extrememely counterproductive in our research and we welcome her warmly. Please RSVP if you would like to attend.

Things that would taste better if they were persimmon flavored:
slimfast
clam chowder
sunny delight
E.L. fudge
motor oil
toothpaste
concrete
green bell peppers


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